Parrot puts some jingle in those bells!
December 23, 2009 
Here’s a story that really needs no explanation. The only thing I want to know is…how did they teach the parrot to sing in that schnazzy english accent?
New discovery has scientists ‘gobsmacked’
December 16, 2009
Filed under Uncategorized
Tags: new discovery, octopus, tool users
Vertebrates aren’t so all that, are they? Yes, the humble invertebrates, long thought to be low down on the food chain, are rising in world opinion now that researchers have discovered the jiggly Amphioctopus marginatus octopus using tools, in particular, the cast off coconut shells that folks have been tossing in the ocean. Julian Finn and Mark Norman observed the tricky octo critters in a series of dive trips to North Sulawesi and Bali. Their findings were published Tuesday in the Journal of Current Biology. Finn was appropriately “gobsmacked” to find the octopuses collecting and lugging along coconut shells which they’d emptied. At any sign of danger, the octopatumuses (or is it octopotomi?) haul themselves into the shells and pull the other half over the top to make a sort of coconutty impenetrable Batmobile. Complex behavior from an animal that doesn’t even have a backbone? Now if that isn’t gobsmacking, I don’t know what is.
Returning library books a couple decades late
Who says people don’t take responsibility in this day and age? Camelback High School librarian Georgette Bordine can prove otherwise. The person who checked out the two Audobon Society books in 1959 got around to returning them, fifty one years late. Along with the returned books, Bordine found a money order for $1000 to cover fines of two cents a day for each book with a little tacked on in case the rates had changed. Now THAT’S a fine citizen!
Treasure found in ten tons of trash!
Needle in a haystack? How about a wedding ring in ten tons of garbage? Here’s a story that will warm you all the way to your cockles. This month Bridget Pericolo put her wedding ring in a cup. The good news is Bridget’s husband of fifty five years, Angelo Pericolo, pitched in with the cleaning. Bad news was he threw away the cup containing the ring. Angelo immediately called the Parsippany, N.J. sanitation supervisor who suggested a trip down to the dump.Here’s the amazing part. Angelo, the dutiful husband, slogged through zillions of trash bags but helping him in the process was the supervisor Michael Brotons and sanitation workers Edgar Lopez and Joseph McGee. Even cooler? They actually found the ring!
Power to the reptiles! Smuggler taken down by irate reptiles
November 18, 2009
Filed under Uncategorized
Tags: humor, Oslo customs, reptiles, smuggler
Power to the reptiles! Smuggler taken down by irate reptiles
If you want to make a reptile angry, stuff one in a sock and tape it to your thighs. If you want to go for broke, try it with 24 reptiles. The Norwegian 22 year old who stuffed 14 Royal Pythons and 10 Albino geckos in socks and taped them to his body was the victim of a bloodless coup, when the critters started up a crazy commotion that was impossible to ignore by customs officials in Oslo last month. Surprisingly, it wasn’t the undulations of the peeved critters that made officials take a close look at the youth, but the tarantula they discovered in his luggage. Reptile smuggling is not uncommon in Norway, which prohibits people from owning many reptile species and the smuggler was fined $2,256 dollars.
To think, the whole mess could have been avoided if the man had gone with a nice fuzzy hamster pet instead. The tarantula who tipped off the coppers had no comment at the time of this report.
Why you don’t take an alligator to show and tell….
November 11, 2009
Filed under Uncategorized
Tags: alligator escape, humor, show and tell
The good news: In the spirit of paternal participation, a Florida Fish and Wildlife officer brought a five foot alligator to his daughter’s classroom show and tell.
The bad news: After the big debut, the critter (perhaps peeved that he wasn’t invited to join in a spirited game of recess basketball) jumped out of the officer’s truck and made a break for it.
The good news: After several hours, the alligator was rounded up before eating any hapless bystanders. Florida wildlife spokesman Stan Kirkland attributed the escape to the alligators “amazing jumping ability” which would no doubt have made him a star at recess basketball.
The bad news: The Florida Wildlife Officer will most likely be teased relentlessly and laughed at by any alligators, or children, he attempts to corral in the future.
The Importance of Penmanship During the Commission of a Felony
Can you hear your first grade teacher talking? Penmanship is important. Even in this age of keyboard glory, handwriting matters as an Oregon woman found out in September when she tried to rob a bank. She handed the clerk a note that said, “Need 300 dollars or I’ll kill you. I’m serious.” The Wells Fargo teller returned the note, explaining she couldn’t make out the handwriting. While the would-be robber turned away to rewrite the note, the teller hit the silent alarm and summoned the police. You see? Those first grade teachers were RIGHT!
Don’t Leave your Breasts on the Train, Please!
October 21, 2009
Filed under Uncategorized
Tags: humor, London's Lost and found, train stations
There’s nothing more intriguing than a Lost and Found. It’s a tiny snapshot into the crazy world of people’s passions and playthings. If you’ve left something on a train, bus, cab or coach during your jaunt through England, you can visit the Lost and Found in the basement of Baker Street, Central London. For 75 years the place has been collecting items left behind by travelers. Not just the expected collection of brollies (though the basement houses more than 7000 lost umbrellas a year), you can find such nutty items as a puffer fish, a home vasectomy kit and a pair of breast implants. Clothing, false teeth, watches and two urns of ashes, have been rescued over the years. No reports on whether or not Jimmy Hoffa has surfaced yet.
The Gift Every President Needs, A Giant Wheel of Cheese
October 13, 2009
Filed under Uncategorized
Tags: humor, Jefferson, John Leland, mammoth cheese
The perfect gift for a President? How about an enormous cheese? It seemed like a great idea to John Leland, in 1801, when he convinced the ladies of his church in Cheshire, Massachusetts to make a gargantuan cheese for Thomas Jefferson, to honor his support of religious liberty. The udders of 900 cows were pressed into service and a cider press functioned as the form for the mega wheel, engraved with the motto “Rebellion to tyrants is obedience to God.” The cheese was schlepped by sleigh across snowy countryside for a total of a 500 mile trip. Due to Jefferson’s policy to refuse gifts while in office, he paid Leland $200 for the cheese and probably served it to every presidential visitor who crossed the threshold thereafter. Rumor has it the mice at Jefferson’s house squeaked out a verse or two of the Hallelujah Chorus when they clapped eyes on Leland’s gift.
Even Presidents Get an Occasional Tushy Nip
Dogs have no respect for titles, even those earned by the former President of France. The UPI reports this month that Sumo, the Maltese lap dog, has no qualms about biting the tushy of the well respected Jacques Chirac. The maltese is apparently not pleased about having to vacate the Elysee Palace after the Chirac’s twelve year stint in office came to a close. In the wake of several nips to the billowy regions, the Chirac family put Sumo on anti-depressants, but to no avail. They finally had to offload the critter to the farm of a family friend who lives outside of Paris. The fresh air must agree with Sumo as he is reportedly much calmer, or perhaps his new owners are taller and the buttocks are out of range.
